The 'Uncle' Magnet

Geez, it would have been a completely carefree outing after a gruesome test/job interview, but the day just can't resist to be a little more annoying. Despite, chilling out at a gorgeous 'hideaway' - greenery sprawling as far as the eye can see ; totally picturesque, a place somewhere owned by a 'datuk', I was surrounded by old men, nice and hospitable as some were, but one decided be an old hag.

Sleazy old atuk, I might add. Since the place is his, I just had to smile away at every 'suggestive' comment. Well, you see, I had my fair share of sleazy grandpas' and daddys' since I entered the university. This unwanted traits soon followed me in my professional years, somehow, the ones dubbed as the 'uncle' of the department would always be flirtatious towards me in particular - you see, I'm not imagining things, my former peers even dubbed me as the 'uncle' magnet. And, of course, I've used this to my advantage in my university days - A from most male lecturers! All these for a few smile and nods.

Here are some examples of worst case scenarios:

Some old hag just woke up from his office, me and a friend happily working on our assignments, suddenly, he decided to park himself next to us, he yawns and moans, so, we asked him just to continue on sleeping, then, he said: 'It's not as nice without someone else to accompany me'. Me and my friend just looked at each other and burst out laughing! We were like..dream on, man!

Another slightly young hag but old enough to be my dad decided it's funny to say that his fish ate Viagra after I asked why is his catfish at an upright position? - Awkward!

An 'uncle' of a department, but not as old as others, unmarried I might add, actually went the extra lengths to dress flashy and started to show his GOLD cards and flashy clothes after I just showed some a little attention on him. Then, started to asked me these personal questions and always aimed me in the classroom, and, to add fuel to the fire, I have annoying friends that would drift the poor fellow to think otherwise. They even tried to proof his affections, by doing a couple of experiments, and it concluded that the hypothesis are correct! But after my presentation of his 'generation' and they're characteristics (-BORING peeps!), he start to loose interest. Slightly. Finally.

I once have a lecturer that wouldn't start a class until I set foot in it. And, mind you during that time I was always late ( thanks to the stupid bus system! ), but thankfully (I guess), it was a tough subject to score but I got an A due to outstanding arguements with the lecturer all the time. Teehee!

Most recentlt, back to the beginning - about the sleazy-resort-owner-hag, old enough to be my grandfather. Though as hospitable as he was, he made some cheesy remarks that would make any girl cringed-and-puke (in that order). Frustating, I know. Sad even. He asked why am I and my friend are not wearing bikini to take a dip at the nearby river? Like duh, mind you, my friend is a total good girl that wears a scarf on daily basis, like she's going to wear a bikini anytime soon. And me? U're gonna blind if you see me in one. Nuff said! Then, when he invited us to go up to his house, he said that's ok, I can't rape you girls because there's a two of you. - What the heck!?
And, when he's promoting the resort to us - asking us to bring up our friends there someday, he said for those who don't have any boyfriends, I can supply a 'blanket' - NO THANKS! After swimming at the river, and changing our clothes, he made a double whammy puke extravaganza: sitting at the patio and waiting for the rest to get ready to head back, the old man said, 'Thankfully, there's no guest around, if not people would think otherwise, Nadia has wet hair and just came out of a room'...I don't get it at first, like what's my wet hair got to do with it?? Then, I just smiled away. Then, I was walking towards the car, I walked pass him, and can't ignore, so, I just smiled, and he said: 'Sexy nyer!'...and as he walked behind me..he moans.

These are the times, how I wish I have a guy that would kick some old man asses.

These kind of things just make you asked: WHAT THE FISH!?